That's mortifying.

So I went out drinking last night with some friends with the full extent of getting ourselves into some crazy shenanigans, as usual. The drink specials were about as amazing as they would ever be, and my rich friend insisted that she pay for absolutely everything. Of course, I fought her offers and paid for all of my own drinks. Well, okay, that was a lie. I let her pay for me. Really though, who am I to turn down a chauvenist? Anyway, she drinks like a fiend and her motto is "no one goes thirsty!" So whenever SHE would finish her drink, she would immediately go for a refill. Which means she would bring back a refill for everyone else too, regardless if we were actually done with our current drink or not. At one point, I was juggling three different alcoholic beverages - one in each hand, and the third resting against my hands and my chest to keep it in place while I dramatically chugged the others. This isn't really the point of the story though. Just kind of setting the scene.

Anyway, we got into some fun, as you could imagine, and did some karaoke. And when I say "some karaoke," I really mean we hogged the stage and sung about half of the song selection book. At some point during this embarassing escapade, I heard someone call my name out while I was on stage singing some random Kings of Leon song. I looked up from the television kindly shooting me the lyrics and peered off into the sea of other drunk idiots. You'd never guess who it was, so I'm just going to go ahead and tell you: it was my sixth grade teacher. What he was doing in Fort Wayne, let alone a night club, is totally beyond me. I didn't even think to ask him after I got off the stage when we completed the song and he pulled me over to exclaim how great we did at the ballad. I thanked him and attempted to scurry away, telling him that I was three seconds away from peeing my pants. But nope, the bathroom excuse didn't work on this clever guy. I guess he probably hears that excuse all the time since he teaches sixth graders, but I don't know. He offered to buy drinks for my friends and I, but I told him no thanks. Uh, okay, that was another lie. I let him buy them for us. Again, who am I to pass up my sixth grade teacher buying shots?

After we poured the shots down our throats, I ran off real quick to actually use the bathroom. No excuses this time - it was finally time to empty the bladder. This means that I ditched my friends and essentially told them to hang out with the guy while I was gone ... and I didn't have all that many intentions on returning to them anytime soon. I mean, come on. My sixth grade teacher in a bar in Fort Wayne buying shots for my friends? That's just a little weird, and I don't really like it. Mmm, another lie. I liked that he bought the shots, but did not like that he was there and chatting with us. I mean, right? Weird.

What a way to end this blog.

Why are people so... weird?

You know what I don't understand? Let me tell you. People. I just don't understand people.

But to be more precise, I don't understand teenage girls. Then again, who does? Har har har.

To the point. As most of you (see: none of you) already know, I work at Borders. And we sell Twilight stuff. Yeah, I'm referring to that vampire series. But anyway, we sell that junk since we carry the books and the DVD. But just last night, the New Moon DVD was being released at -- wait for it -- midnight. And I had to work the release party. Oh goodie! But not goodie. In fact, it was pretty stupid, just as all release parties tend to be. However, this party seemed a little different in the fact that people actually showed up to it. In my opinion, it's not really a party unless everyone is at least 18, there is copious amounts of alcohol present and some bumping music to dance to (see: falling down stairs to). But alas, none of those three factors were present last night. The most we got were fifty pre-teen girls, some coffee samples from the cafe and the New Moon soundtrack depressingly droning on in the background. I switched the CD on the main overhead to the new Train album, but someone took notice and immediately switched it back to New Moon. I sort of felt as if I was turning into a vampire myself.

Anyway, what I don't understand is how these pre-teen girls can get some infatuated with something so... menial, you know? Twilight isn't real. Edward the vampire isn't real, and neither is Jacob the werewolf (please don't mock me for knowing the characters and their forms). But these fifty or some girls were back in the Kids section leading DISCUSSIONS about stuff from the books and movies. I mean, what!? And they weren't just discussing matters, but they were FURIOUSLY DEBATING things. It was almost laughworthy. In fact, it was full-out laughworthy.

I don't knock people for what they like to partake in, but really, this is almost too far.

Spring Break 2010

Well, it's official. I've started my planning with my friends on where we're going to be going for Spring Break this year, and we've decided on the very cliched vacationing spot of Florida. Panama City Beach, Florida, to be exact. It's supposedly one of the top college Spring Break destinations, so we're pretty pumped to go and get ourselves into all sorts of crazy shenanigans. I mean, drinking in public? How awesome is that going to be? The last time I did that was, well, a couple of days ago, but this will be on the beach. And everyone else will be drinking too so I won't look like a total weirdo.

I've been to Panama City before, but it was back in high school. I had just turned 16 years old and I was, unfortunately, with my family for that trip. So I couldn't go all out crazy, or so I wasn't supposed to. Because if you know me, you know that I did go totally crazy that week, regardless that my parents and some of the extended family were right in front of me at all times, watching me like a hawk in case I got kidnapped or raped or something equally as horrifying. But that trip (and I mean this with all of my heart) stripped me of my innocense. Haha, I know, I know, sounds really dramatic, but it's totally true. The things that I got myself into, the people that I met down there, the experiences that I faced -- all of that shaped me and changed me so much within just one week that I changed drastically after I got back home and went back to school. It's amazing how something can really change a person. I won't go into details about the exact things I got myself into because, well, some of them aren't too great and definitely not appropriate for a class blog (har har), but Panama City Beach changed me in such a way (and it was a good way, mind you) that I'm super stoked to go back again for another week to see if I can have anymore UNSUPERVISED, crazy happenings.

Anyway, in preparation of this glorious Spring Break festivity, I've started tanning again. And boyyyyy, it's been years since I've done that. Again, back in high school was when I was mucho tan and sexy. But ever since college crept up on me four years ago, I haven't had the funds to keep my skin a beautiful golden brown. Until now, folks. Spring Break in Florida... Come on, I can't go there looking like a total paste-face. I'd get made fun of so much. No one would want to invite me or my friends to their crazy beach parties, and they certainly wouldn't allow such a pale ghost to use their beer bongs. Nope, so I hopped into that tanning bed the other day for exactly ten minutes, and when I came out... ahh, refreshing! But then a couple of hours passed and my skin started to heat up. And then it heated up more and more and more and more until I was burnt. Damn. So no tanning today until my supple, damaged, lobster-looking skin decides to heal. But I'm only giving it until tomorrow. I need to get back into the tanning bed regardless if I look like a #3 platter at Long John Silvers because, dammit, I'm going to be sexy in Florida. I don't even care.

But we still have to get the motel worked out, and my work schedule is NOT helping any. My manager isn't budging on giving me the time off for the entire week, but I decided that if she schedules me (which I've already talked to her about all of this), I'm just going to have to call in sick. Every day. And my excuse will be, "Oops, I can't come into work today because, well, I'm in Florida. Bye."

So if I still have my low-paying, minimum wage retail job when I come back to Indiana in two weeks, I'll be surprised.

You think I'm who!?

You know what? I'm just going to come right out and say it.

I am not a Jonas Brother.

Nope, I'm not the fourth (or fifth?) missing Jonas Brother, and no, I never will be. I mean, sure, the money they make would be pretty sweet to have, and those purity rings they wear everywhere sure are shiny, but come on now. And yeah, Miley Cyrus is kind of cool in her own right. She has two personalities and she is able to rock a wig even before scoring any wrinkles on her face. That takes some talent to wear a wig properly - a blonde one, at that. But no, I'm not a Jonas Brother, I don't rock out on stage with them, I don't make out with Disney stars and I certainly don't pose for J-14 magazine (although I wouldn't mind doing so).

Point is, I'm not a Jonas Brother. So to the little girl at Fazoli's that came up to me during my scrumptious lasagna and twenty-seven breadsticks meal and asked if I was a Jonas Brother, sorry to say, but no. I sadly do not have the last name of "Jonas," nor will I ever unless their parents decide that I should be their newly adopted step-child. But I don't really see that happening anytime soon.

The little girl was so freaking adorable, too. You could tell she was a huge Disney fan. I don't even think I look like a Jonas Brother. Well, at least not today, I didn't. My hair was done in the funkiest way possible, and I had the ugliest lip rings in today that made me look like a vampire with pasta sauce oozing from my mouth. And my eyes were puffy because I was hungover from ingesting way too much tequila last night. I don't think any of the Jonas Brothers drink tequila, by the way. And I'm pretty sure I smelled like puke and cat litter, mixed with some sort of coffee after-stench. To be honest, I was a regular rank-ass. It was a tough night, let me tell you.

But I remember singing a Jonas Brother song during that party... It was pretty catchy too.

You know what? Maybe I am a Jonas Brother. Maybe that little girl saw something within me, within my bloodshot eyes, and saw my true identity. Maybe. Just maybe.

Citizen Wayne

I'm almost entirely "written-out" by this point. Catching up on homework during this horrific snowstorm/blizzard/apocalypse couldn't have been a better time to do so, but why did I have to decide to finish it all right before work tonight? Oh geez, shoot me.

Anyway, that's beside the point. I wanted to take this opportunity to talk about my community final project that is coming up fairly soon. Not really to announce it to the whole class, but kind of just my way to get it out there and to remember any ideas that I'm coming up with. I'm doing that Citizen Wayne thing, I suppose. I'm a Journalism major, and I want to get into radio broadcasting, so I figured this would be an excellent way to get my foot into the door. With my luck, though, my foot'll get slammed somehow. It always seems to happen. Well, rhetorically speaking, I mean.

Oh, and also, if anyone is even remotely interested (I don't blame you if you aren't - really, I won't hold it against you), I could use some suggestions or anything else of the like. I talked to Prof. Cain about some other things to do after the actual narrative is written up and possibly broadcasted, and she mentioned maybe making another blog and getting other people's opinions on the narrative that I'm writing up. Not opinions, per se, but their life experiences dealing with the same thing I will be chit-chatting on the airwaves about. Who knows. I guess I just don't know what else to really do once the actual Citizen Wayne thing is done and over with. I mean, there has to be more to it, right? I can't just finish the project by writing up a four page narrative, can I? That seems a tad too easy.

Does anyone else know anything about the remainder of the project? I sound like I'm completely lost in the dark here, but I'm truly not. Just kind of confused about certain aspects of the project. If anyone happens to know anything, and actually reads this blog this week, I'd really appreciate any answers regarding this. And again, I understand if you read this far, and decide NOT to comment because you don't know either. Or you could just say "hello" and put a smiley face afterwards and use that as your blog response.

Goodbye. :)

Homeworkkkkk

I sort of can't really stand school, not going to lie. Well, no, I retract that statement. It's not school that I hate, per se, but it's my horrific ability to procrastinate almost everything to the very last minute. I hate scrambling to get everything done, but seriously, there are so many other things I could be doing. Like -- I don't know -- Facebook. Or washing my hair, or something. But as I look down from the computer screen and onto my agenda book thing, I see all of these assignments from multiple classes building up and piling around me. So and so is due on Monday, this and that is due on Tuesday, THIS assignment is due before midnight tonight. Oh geez, I can't keep up with all of this. And you know what makes it ten times worse? I'm taking a mini-vacation right now at my parents' house hours away from Fort Wayne. I should be enjoying myself. But rush, rush, rush to get this all done because the Superbowl is tonight, and my parents are having over a million people that are going to be hideously loud, and what will I be doing? Homework. Oh, and drinking alcohol and eating fried food too, but mostly homework.

Yeah, yeah, I know it's my fault for putting everything off, but I had a rushed end of the week, too. Not only did I catch a cold/flu/mild-death, but it was my 22nd birthday, and of course I had to go take shots of tequila at 3 in the afternoon with my friends, then proceed to drink for twelve more hours. Hence why I haven't had time to do anything. Okay, so that isn't such a good reason to blow off homework, and I realize that. But meh, I guess rushing to get stuff done is what we all do.

Rant

You know what really sucks? Knowing that the company you work for is quickly going down the tubes, and you're going to be forced to start looking for another job much sooner than later. Such has been my work-life for the past couple of years. I work for the second biggest name in the book selling industry. A once thriving bookstore chain that is now scrambling to find any sort of money they can to pay back their immense amount of bills. That's not all, folks. Oh, no.

Just earlier today, the CEO of the company fled from his position. We're not talking "quitting with a hope for a better tomorrow," but actually fleeing from the company. Yes, the bold and italics make it seem more dramatic, but it's just in its style. The stock (which was already pretty pathetic) plummeted down to less than a dollar in just a couple of hours of the announcement. Oh, great. If you do even a tiny amount of research, you'd know what company I'm currently (but not much longer) working for.

Being the only book company that doesn't have their own brand of e-Reader, and the only one that owes billions upon billions of dollars to third-party companies just to repay debts from years before, this chain (which I'm not at liberty to say, by the way - company policy; yay for anonymity!) was looking doom in its face for years now, but just today it really started to sink in. This company is tanking, and very quickly for that matter.

I'm really only writing this as a blog so I can look back on it in the coming months, and see where (if anywhere) the company stands. I highly doubt the brand name will be here past April, since that is when the hideous amounts of debt that can't possibly be paid are due. So, with that, I am going job searching tomorrow morning. Perhaps across the street to the #1 name in the bookselling business. We'll see.

Also, how in the heck do you "subscribe" to other bloggers on this thing? I have half the class following my blog, and I want to be a nice guy and follow you all back, but I have no idea how!